Humanity's Latest Genocide

All throughout history, the human race has combated fear with violence. Fear is a natural survival instinct and the modern day, intelligent person can override this fear with logic and reasoning. However not all people fall into the category of intelligent. These people tend to make rash, impulsive and often uninformed decisions based around this fear.

Shark culling is perhaps one of the most ignorant, moronic, cowardly and downright lazy solutions to what is legitimately barely a problem. Now what concerns me about the latest species we are trying to push into the brink of extinction isn’t entirely the wellbeing of the Sharks. What truly concerns me is how this course of action has made it through our government.

I can promise you, that this decision was not at all based in fact, and if it were, they are looking at the wrong facts. How can the people we have elected to lead us, to make decisions based on our behalf, be so fucking retarded?

When Shark culling is discussed on news stations, some of the first stats to be brought up are, increased attacks, increased numbers of sharks and increased fatality rates. It literally takes one Google search to realize that these aren’t actual issues. From 2011/12, 247 sharks were sighted of the coast of WA. In 2012/13, 285 sharks were sighted. Now Nick! Maybe you’re the one who is retarded, that number has increased drastically in the past year! Pot calling the kettle black! I urge you to actually look further into the stats and think for yourself. The amount of time spent patrolling for Sharks in helicopters from 2011/12 to 2012/13 increased by 70 hours. The more time you spend looking, the more you will find.

Increased attacks are what astound me the most. People think that increased attacks mean that sharks have had a group meeting. It went something like this.

“Alright boys, I ate a human yesterday, fucking scrumdiddlyumptious. Lets just fuck off our regular diet and aggressively hunt humans. Even though we only actually get 3 – 5 people a year it seems like the next step in our evolution”

So after that meeting it was only rational to aggressively hunt them back! Lets just knock a couple thousand off around the place and that should just fix it right up.

FIX WHAT YOU STUPID FUCKS? There is legitimately not an issue here. Coconuts, Champagne corks, Cows, Bees, Horses, Ladders, Ants, Hippos, Icicles, Lightning, and even fucking Vending machines are statistically more likely to kill you than a Shark is.

That’s it lads, we need to start culling Vending machines. They’re getting out of hand. They’re becoming more aggressive.

That is legitimately about as rational as hunting sharks.

It’s the small political decisions like this that tend to really aggravate me. I simply don’t understand how this decision was approved. Did they just literally not bother to look into it at all and say, kill thousands of these majestic creatures. Or did they look into it, and are that staggeringly moronic that they thought this was a logical solution to a serious problem. That leaves us with two sad options. The people that lead this great country are either malicious with no regard for life, or are of the same intelligence level as Homer Simpson. Actually that’s an insult to Homer Simpson, even he isn’t that stupid.

Now I’m a rational and caring person and if you’re genuinely still scared after everything I just said, fear no longer I have the ultimate solution.

Swim in a pool you silly cunt.